[Killua doesn't want to explain that a couple years ago, shortly after running away from home, he'd laid waste to a couple of guys for trying to beat him up—not simply because he was defending himself, but because he was in a bad mood, worked up over not being able to win a game he'd been working at for hours.
or how during the war with the chimera ants, who yes, were creatures, but were also people, he thought nothing of killing them.
that it was easy to slip back into his trained mindset, and just take lives because he could, or he was supposed to.
overall, Killua's reaction to Blue's stepping back, or the conjuring of ice at his feet... is cold itself. it hurts, but he can bear it. he just tries to shut it down, but the color around Killua, so subtly, dims.]
I don't necessarily want to.
[but he doesn't mind doing it. he almost killed Guzma.]
Sometimes, I have to.
...but probably not here, unless me or a friend's in trouble.
[in some ways, Illumi was right, Killua guesses. this is what Illumi meant. it makes him miss Gon.]
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timeasmymeasure
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Date: 2019-05-27 05:32 am (UTC)or how during the war with the chimera ants, who yes, were creatures, but were also people, he thought nothing of killing them.
that it was easy to slip back into his trained mindset, and just take lives because he could, or he was supposed to.
overall, Killua's reaction to Blue's stepping back, or the conjuring of ice at his feet... is cold itself. it hurts, but he can bear it. he just tries to shut it down, but the color around Killua, so subtly, dims.]
I don't necessarily want to.
[but he doesn't mind doing it. he almost killed Guzma.]
Sometimes, I have to.
...but probably not here, unless me or a friend's in trouble.
[in some ways, Illumi was right, Killua guesses. this is what Illumi meant. it makes him miss Gon.]